CURACAO - Part TROIS

‘I don’t want it staring at me.

“Not to worry, they’ll fix it for you.”

“But no Eyes, yes?’

“I'll have them take the head off.”

“They better… I don’t like it lookin' at me!”

“They’ll take care of it”

“But…”

“Don’t worry, it will be fine!”

Not quite the start of Curacao Part TROIS we planned, that is more the middle but first… a Word from our Sponsor.

•  If this episode begins to read like one of Chucky’s Restaurant Reviews, welllll, 

Read on...

Bells ringing, flags dropping and the iron gate slides open to free our Brave Bridge Warriors to join the rest of the hardy Band of Hungry Hounds and we head on down the riverside to check out Gouverner de Rouville.

A photo op here: - pose – grin – click –one more – ok… 

A photo op there:

- pose – grin – click –Again – ok… 

And we arrive at a lovely Maroon-ish building with a cute courtyard and proceed to review the menus posted in an elaborate marquee which indicates that it is the menu for the “First Floor”.  Hmmmm, maybe up one flight of stairs is the {first floor}, because looking around, the courtyard does appear to be a separate business and there is another menu board across the entrance in the courtyard. 

The menu for the {first floor} appears a bit pricey and before making any decisions we cross the courtyard to peruse the “Other Menu” only to find that it too is pricier than our group expected for Local Fare. {Hey Guys... this the tourst part of town]

 M&M decide to head back to the boat, while M&D, DL and Chucky discuss going with them or did they really want local fare.  

Up strolls a jovial chap who introduces himself as Chef Andre, {says so right on his jacket} the new owner of ZOYA the Restaurant in the courtyard, formerly the chef "up one flight {first floor}" of de Gouverner who proceeds to describe his Local Fare for us.  We step away to confer… upstairs to the original, or give this guy a try… well, we did come for Local Fare, and he recently WAS the Chef up one flight {first floor}, Aw Heck, lets give him a go.

While Chef Andre starts to schmooze other innocent souls to try his “Local Fare”, we are ushered to a lovely table on the outer edge of the courtyard by what may, or may not have been the Maitre d’.

While Chucky ducks across the street to shoot a pic of the Colorfully painted Buildings on the opposite shore, a Curacao Signature 
{remember the Governor's paint factory?} 
a tray of Amuse Bouche- “compliments of the Chef”- was delivered to the table.  Something in a Mussel shell with what might have been cream cheese, tomato tid-bits and a sprig of dill {no explanation offered} -rolls and butter.

Shortly after finishing the little tidbits, menu’s were offered by a delightful young waiter [no–American Style intro] who took our drink order and disappeared, Literally – didn’t see him for 15 minutes. 

{Probably had to run down the street to buy the Dewar’s}

Meanwhile… we go over the menu delighting at the Local “sounding” Fare and making a few choices.

    We pause to note:

    A running theme of this group at each meal has been the Pun-ish joke:

   Set up: What do you call a fish with no eyes?

   Punchline: Fsssshhhhh.

 Get it?!?!     No -I’s…     Aw common… 
OK, ya hadda been there to HEAR it.

Soooooo…. Of course a featured menu item is… 
Wait for it….

Wait…..

Broiled Fresh “Local” Red Snapper.

Dragon Chic luuuuvs Broiled Snapper and is about to order it after Houdini reappears with our drinks when Chucky hastens to warn her… as most Local Fare elsewhere, it will probably come – Head On – and you know what that means… Hence the opening dialogue. 

She most definitely:

“Don’t Want any Fsssshhhh Staring At Me!!!

Chef Andre passes by sensing there might be questions and assures her that he will remove the head in the kitchen before serving.

We also inquire about the cut of meat used in the “Braised Stewed Local Beef” and he assures us it is a “Top Cut of Beef.”

Houdini magically reappears and we order appetizers, M&D the ceviche to share, Chucky decides on the “Fire Roasted Pumpkin Soup” while DL declares the Amuse Bouche was enough for her.

And we wait… {must be out dredging the scallops for the ceviche}

Appetizers finally arrive and… while nicely presented, M&D were not pleased with the ceviche which appeared to be a platter of assorted pickled seafood –Pickled with what –not sure- but Pickled being the operative word here.

Chucky’s pumpkin soup was “OK”, nothing quite like the elaborate description {these things never are} lacking in any discernable spices, just plain, warm, gritty, pumpkin puree. 
Not worth a picture
Oh wellllll, maybe the entrees will be better...

If they would ever come… 

Like Houdini the disappearing waiter / bartender / maitre d’ {whatevah}… The Meal seemed as if it might also have been a figment of our imagination - 
Sooooo... after an hour +, with no approach for another cocktail [a bus person cleared the appetizer plates] and Houdini nowhere in sight, Chucky decides to venture inside to find someone –anyone - to inquire if we should head “Up One Flight” and try the {first floor} when he runs into…

Houdini and the Maitre d’ headed out of the kitchen with what might have been…

Is it… 
Oh wait….

Yesssss - 
OUR ENTRÉE’s! YEA!!!!

Dragon Chic’s Snapper is indeed served Head Off – no Staring Fsssshhhh for her!

Michelle’s Tapas Platter of “Local Delights” however left a lot to be desired. A non-descript platter of Dried Chicken Drumettes masquerading as Hot Wings, tasteless Mussels, Fried Something indescribable, rock hard fried Banana and the 

Piece de Resistance… 

for “Lightly Breaded Chicken Tenders” she got…

Chicken McNuggets…

NO REALLY!!!

Pre-Formed, “previously frozen” Chicken McNuggets.  
{you cant make this stuff up folks!!}

We were all at a total loss for words, and almost lacked the presence of mind to take a picture of this disaster, but Michelle came through with pics of it all for the NOWAT.

Chucky snapped a pic of DL's Headless Fsssshhhh 
{or what little was left after the head came off}

We also shot a pic of Dan and Chucky’s “Stew of Braised Beef” which looked yummy, was very fragrant, with lots of flavors and exotic seasoning in the broth and might have gone down well except…

They over braised, stewed or just plain mangled the “Top Cut of Beef” to such a degree that it was almost inedible.  But the stew had lots of flavor!!!

Dan Noted:
"Perhaps if Chef Andre spent less time on the side walk roping business and more time in the kitchen attending to details, he might not have to send to McDonalds for the "Chicken McTenders".

Oh Welllll… so much for the search for Local Fare - better yet, it might be Best to search somewhere other than ZOYA - in the Courtyard - on the River – in Curacao. 

Or… you could go Up One Flight to the {first floor} of De Gouverner.

In the middle of the Meal, we did see N&K {back from the ship} stop by and look at both Menu Marquee’s but they disappeared, or maybe they went up One Flight…we'll never know.

After another painful wait to get a check… No we were not gonna tempt fate by ordering dessert… 
and we were OUTTA THERE -

A leisurely stroll past a colorfully lit open bridge
and back through the Renaissance Mall & Rif Fort - a spot created Purely for tourists - and out the other side, along  the waterside trail, with photo ops galore:

- pose – grin – click –one more – ok… 

DL and the Ship all lit up - a colorful beacon in the night, 




and we were back on board just in time to head to the Chic Dining room for “Just Dessert & Coffee”, much to the relief of Alan, a FunTime waiter who was trying to close his station.

A quick trip to the Alchemy for a Night Cap, a look in the Piano Bar to find no seats and we all head to our cabins… tomorrow was gonna be a VERY early day since we had to meet up with Brenda and Rob of British Columbia for our hasty cab ride to the Dragon Ladies Pirate Ship - Rope Swing.  There will be Video’s!!!

Ciao 4 Now,

Uncle Chuck & The No Fish Stares for her...

Dragon Lady